I'm Dick Cheney yes
I'm the real Cheney
All you other Dick Cheney's are just imitatin'

I'm feeling pretty bad for Dick Cheney, but long before he started shooting his hunting buddies, I was guilty of the same thing. While planning the 2002 reunion and chatting on the blog, Joe Petrasek emailed me something about shooting him with my BB gun. I thought he was joking, but then recalled I have a gift...it's really a form of amnesia...about unpleasant past experiences. I try not to think about unpleasant past experiences, and then they just disappear from my memory. I thank God every day for that gift.

But then, in June 2002, I get this email from Joe:

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Hi Lee,

Just getting back to you on the BB gun incident. As I remember, many...many...years ago, we were about 10 or 11 years old when we decided to go hunting over the MARSH. As you remember the Marsh was a dump area for a steel (structural iron works) fabricator. The Marsh is where all the young juveniles from Swoyersville and Luzerne hung out.

The marsh always had a light green or orange tint to it. It always had 5 gallon paint cans and 55 gallon drums floating on the surface. It was a great place to ice skate in the winter. Always had to look out for those obstacles while skating. (55 gal drums, wooden skids, paint cans, rail road ties...) A GREAT PLACE TO PLAY... enough of that, on with the story...

We were on a hunt for anything that moved. We hunted the trees on the west side and the flat ground on the east side. We were walking on the east side of the marsh when I think a rabbit ran out between you and I (I was approx. 10 yds. in front of you) and you either swung you gun around and the gun went off or you shot at the rabbit and the BB ricocheted off something and bit me square it the back. (A little Forrest Gump there). I think I fell to my knees it hurt so bad. The size of the welt was huge. Nice shot... BINGO... You got ME!!!

I hope this refreshes you memory or maybe there was no rabbit... I now remember that cold blank stare.

I just want to know one thing. Were you anywhere near Dealey Plaza, Dallas Texas around 12:25 p.m, November 22nd, 1963? Are you sure you weren't on the Grassy Knoll? Were you the "Umbrella Man?" I don't care if you were only 4 or 5 years old.

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I responded to Joe after this email and went into the first phase of grief, i.e, denial, offering up suggestions that it was really another one of our friends who had done the deed. Then I remembered my 'gift', that one where I forget unpleasant experiences and chalked it up to that and subsequently issued a public apology (linked to our headliners page).

After issuing this public apology, Joe accepted it much to my relief. I can't say for sure how long this time lapse was before notifying the public of my misdeed, but certainly decades longer than the 14 hours that Cheney delayed in telling his story. I'm just glad I'm not the vice president of the USA, and I suspect after this public admission, it's no longer in the cards for me.

Now with this experience under my belt, I feel compelled to offer some advice to our V.P.: Get yourself a blog or webpage and admit to your guilt, get it off your chest, and ask for forgiveness. Offer a running commentary on the health of your friend. Then and only then will the media storm abate and you can get back to running the country.